As Told By Gifs: Eating After Surgery

Hello people of the Internet! It has three months since my gastric bypass and I have lost thirty five pounds!



Hooray for me!

 

The weight lost has changed everything about me: My figure, my attitude, and especially my eating habits. You see before the GB I would eat anything simply because it was within eyesight but now the only time I can eat is when I am actually hungry.

So what if you have free pizza?  I have an essay to finish

In fact unless I really am hungry for it food is absolutely disgusting.

 

What is this sandwich made out of, toxic waist?
 

I think back on all the times I would just stuff my self without and ounce of remorse and think: Why the fuck would I do that to my body? However even though cutting and stitching my stomach down to the size of an ice cube has decreased the number of times I get hungry I still do. And when my stomach starts grumbling....I turn into something else.

 

 

 

 

 And God have mercy on you if you get in my way.

 

That's my cheeseburger!


 

It creeps me out a little how food can go from a faint blip on my radar to the center of my universe in a matter of hours. The worst thing about this is that even though I feel like I want to eat everything in sight my stomach size makes me full seconds into eating.

 

Three bites of ham sandwich is good enough

 

 

 However all because my gut is telling me I have had enough I don't have to listen to it.

 

A sloppy Joe as good as this deserves at least five more bites!
 

But I do anyway because if I don't I run the risk of dumping. For those of you who want to know what dumping is here is a link to a website that can explain it better than I can. For those of you who want to know what dumping feels like please refer to the below gif.

 

It's like your stomach just decides to punish you and the worst part of it is that you don't know how sever it will be nor how long it will last. It could be as light as a few seconds of dry heaving or as brutal as hour long bloating; aching so bad that all you can do is curl up in the fetal position and prey that it stops. As awful as this is it is the point of gastric bypass. Because of the pain I don't eat the food that causes it-mainly sodas and sugary stuff-and because I'm not eating that food I am losing weight. Sure there are times when I wish I could have a cookie or other types of sweet.

I'd sell my soul just for one lick!

 The mountains of vitamins I have to take on a daily basis so I don't develop a deficiency is extremely annoying as well as bitter.

Drug addicts would say I have a problem
 

 

And I have lost count of the people who say: "But you're so young, couldn't you have just dieted and exercised?"

 

 

 Readers, the reason why my weight got so out of control wasn't because I couldn't diet or exercise. In fact I absolutely loved to go to the gym; one time I stayed on the elliptical for two whole hours! But no matter how much I worked out my efforts would mean nothing since I had no self control when it came to food. I don't know if it's because of my genetics or my Aspergers but for some reason I couldn't leave the dinner table without my stomach aching. It was like I had something inside of me urging me to eat one more cookie or have another glass of soda and I just didn't have the strength to say no to it. And because of this I weighed two hundred and fifty pounds by the time I was twenty and I was miserable.

 

I chose to get the gastric bypass not because I was lazy and wanted a quick fix but because I could no longer deny that I had a serious problem and if I didn't get help it would kill me. Yes, the surgery was terrifying and the recovery painful but I knew it was all worth it because it would help me place me on a path towards a long, healthy, and happy life. Being able to fit in to a size ten jeans or walk without having to stop for air every twenty steps isn't what fills me with joy but for the first time in my life I can look in the mirror and say: I love who I am.

 

 

That's all I have to say so until next post Live well, Laugh often, and Love much.

 

 

 

Gifs courtesy of

 

http://giphy.com/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



My Thoughts On: The Ray Rice domestic abuse scandal

Hello people of the Internet! Like most of you I have been following the domestic violence former Raven's Football player, Ray Rice, inflicted on his then fiancée Janay Rice. I believe domestic violence-regardless of the victim or  the abuser's gender, race, or sexuality-is one of the worst crimes a human being can do to another human being outside of murder and child molestation. While I was shocked that Janay defended her husband and I pray that Ray Rice rots in Hell the majority of my anger is directed at Janay Rice's family.



Right to left: Janay Rice, Ray Rice, Rayven Rice

The reason why domestic abuse can go on for years without anyone knowing isn't just because the abuser threatens to kill the victim-or their family and loved one-if he or she leaves but that they brainwash them until their self-esteem and worth is so low that they believe they are nothing without the abusers. When they get beat they will make up excuses to why they deserve it and if the abuse is discovered they will defend the abuser much like Janay Rice has done as of late. Because of this domestic violence is one of the most under reported crimes in America and has an 70-80% chance of ending in the death of ether-but most likely-the victim or the abusers.

But what gets me about this case is that even though Janay's family had to have seen the way that piece of trash-because he lost his right to be called a man the second he laid hands on her-dragged their daughter, sister, and blood kin out of that elevator as if she were a hunk of meat a month later they sat down and watched as she became his wife.



Her father walked her down the isle.

Her sister made a speech at the dinner.

The people who shared her blood sat their and let her vow to spend the rest of her life with someone who merely thirty days prior to this union did this to her:

.....You know, Ray Rice is lucky that he didn't do that to one of my siblings. I know a lot of people say that but I truly mean it. Because if a man or a woman lost their minds and hit my sister or my brother the next thing you'd here about it wouldn't be how I spoke at their wedding as if the person they were married to wasn't a piece of cancerous scum stuck to the ass of life but of how I snuck into their house while they slept and smothered them to death with a pillow or at the very least broke them so severely that they needed machine to breathe for the rest of their life.

Unlike Janay's family it doesn't matter how famous they are or how rich they are but that they caused  someone I love pain and if the law doesn't punish them as they deserve then I will. Especially if a niece or nephew is involved because studies have show that children who witnessed or endure domestic abuse are more likely to become victims and abusers themselves when they grow up. I pray, for the sake of Janay and her beautiful baby girl, that she gathers the courage to leave that thing before she ends up dead and I say the same thing to anybody reading this who is in the situation.

It doesn't matter how much your abusers says they love you or how much you love them the only way the beatings will stop is if you leave and never go back. There are hundreds of shelters and organizations that have been created to help those in your situation like the NCADV who supplied me with these domestic abuse statistic.

If you our someone you know is being abused you can contact them at  1-800-799-7233.

That is all I have to say on this post but before I go I want every person reading to know one thing: You are a precious human being and their is nothing or no one on this earth that has the right to tell you otherwise.


Sources:

http://giphy.com/gifs/e0ZEOmcLq785y

http://www.ncadv.org/files/DomesticViolenceFactSheet(National).pdf