Hello people of the internet! I'm sure you have heard about the Supreme Court saying that Hobby Lobby can deny their female employees accesses to birth control because it violates their religious right. To that I say:
Man I love this gif!
If you ask anyone who knows me they will tell you that I am very passionate about stuff like this because I believe that being a mother, no, being a parent in general is the most hardest job in the world. Now, I you've heard this a thousand times before-especially around mother's and father's day-but it truly is the hardest, tedious, time consuming, energy draining, insanity breaking job on this planet. For those of you who have kids you understand this pretty well but for those who don't let me put it to you this way:
Nine months after a night a of fun you get yourself a new roommate that you are completely responsible for. Everyday for the next eighteen-but technically more like twenty nine if you're lucky-years you have to make sure that this roommate is fed, clothed, educated, and healthy. As if this wasn't stressful enough you have to meet these needs completely on your dime. Every bill and payment is completely up to you to pay off and even if this roommate wanted to help out they legally can't until the sixteenth year. On top of that whenever this roommate gets in trouble-skips class, breaks the law, curse out your neighbors-the burnt of the punishment falls on your shoulders. You might even have to pay for any tickets and fines! And if not financially you end up paying socially by having other people look down on you for your poor management of your roommate. To make things worse if you fail to meet this roomates needs even by accident you could be put in jail! And after the eighteen years are up, after all you have sacrificed just to make sure this roommate is happy the chances are high that they will just dump you in a different apartment with a bunch of other people like you to die. And the whole reason why you go through this is because you love that roommate with all of your heart.
Now imagine going through all of that if you didn't want the child? If you made a mistake a someone forced it on you? Not only would you suffer but the child would too. I know some might argue "If you don't want the kid why not give it up for adoption?" but those people don't understand how hard giving up a child is. You're not donating an old pair of shoes but sacrificing your rights to see a being you carried inside you for nine months! For every mother who gave up their baby for adoption their are probably five who backed out because they grew too attached and want to keep it despite if they can't even afford the baby!
The decision to have an abortion should be completely up to the mother and no church, politician, or craft store should have the right to mess with it.
Hello people of the internet! Before today abortion clinics in Massachusetts were allowed to set up a non-protesting or buffer zone around their property in order to protect their patients from pro-life protestors. But unfortunately as of today the Supreme Court has decided to strike down this measure of protection and to that I have this to say:
And the boat your granny came on
Contrary to pro-life beliefs abortions are not an easy way out for woman but a hard and heartbreaking decision. It could be that the woman would die if she went through the pregnancy or that she was raped and can not stand the stress of carrying her attackers baby. Sometimes it could simply be because she is not financially or emotionally ready to become a mother. Despite their reason every woman should have the right to have an abortion without being harassed by a bunch of religious bigots!
Hello people of the internet! Hey parents, do you have a teen that is obsessed with the internet? Do you believe that their constant tweeting and instagramming is unhealthy, unnatural, and detrimental to their health? Sadly in the USA you can only think about beating the addiction out of them but over in China you can actually send them to a camp and have the people there do it for you!
Apparently Chinese people-mainly teens-have such a bad addiction with surfing the information superhighway that not only did their country classify it as a mental disorder but camps have been created claiming that they can "cure" people of it. This would be good and dandy if the camps methods didn't end up maiming or even killing their campers.
Just last week a nineteen year old girl, Guo Lingling, died from injuries to her skull and brain which she received from a two hour beating conducted by instructors at one of these camps. During the "training session" the girl was kicked and forced to fall on her back and face repeatedly all because she didn't ask permission to go to the bathroom. Sadly this type of abuse is quite common in these camps and usually goes on unpunished because the camps keep the kids blocked off from the outside world and even go so far as to check their mail to make sure they aren't writing about the abuse. These kids are so desperate to get away from these monsters that when Guo's mother came to the camp to pick up her daughter's body the students threw paper at her with phone numbers and pleas for help.
This story just makes me sick. I admit that the people of today are too attached to the internet-myself included-but beating and even trying to electro shock the addiction out of them isn't going to work! My heart goes out to Guo's family and all the other kids who are currently suffering in camps like this.
Warning: The pictures on this post may not be suitable for certain age groups
Hello people of the internet! Thanks to the threat of brain eating amoeba and the high cost of gas my family and I have not been able to hit the beach this summer. At first I was disappointed-since I am bit of a water baby-but now I am relieved because it has spared me the horrifying chance of seeing this in real life.
What. The. Holly. Hell?
This ladies and gentlemen is an asymmetrical man thong or a C-shape thong, and yes it is the most horrifying article of swimwear I have ever seen. The basic concept is for a guy to hook it between their butt cheeks and over their junk and hope to God that the strip of spandex keeps their family jewels safely tucked away. Now, before you say anything I know that women wear skimpy bathing suits too and I don't think it's okay either.
She's just wearing hair extensions and an uncomfortable wince
It's just that I can't wrap my mind around why a guy would willing put this on outside of a bet; especially if they intend swim in it. I mean, even the most conservatively dressed beach goer face the threat of a wardrobe malfunction every time they step into those waves and with this I'm pretty sure all it would take is a strong gust of wind to displace it. Also-forgive me if I sound like a bitch-but unless you have a body that would make Hercules jealous this thing is going to make a lot of people sick.
Hello people of the internet! While you guys were enjoying your tuesday I was busy chocking down a wholesome glass of chalk flavored pepto sprinkled with lip burning pop rocks. You see, before I could take the final steps towards getting my gastric bypass surgery I had to go to the radiologist and get some picks of my stomach. But before I could do it I had to starve from 12 p.m. monday to about 8:00 clock tuesday!
And thirsty
As uncomfortable as this was at least the people at the doctor's office weren't total douches; they even had a small basket of snacks that I could have after I was done which made them saints in my eyes. However they do get some points taken off for leaving me hanging when I had to change out of my clothes and into a robe. Unlike your standard hospital gowns that present your bare as to the world like a presenter at the oscars the gown I wore offered a lot more coverage by way of a third hole which you loop your right arm through much like a toga. While I was relieved to be spared the embarrassment of accidental nudity I was stuck in that small changing-room-type-stall for a good two minutes because I had no idea how to put the thing on!
The thing had a tag but when I managed to it in the back it the collar nearly chocked me and exposed all my stuff! Thank God I was able to catch and lock the door-which I had forgotten to lock-before the nurse came back in. Unfortunately for my pride I had to ask my mom for help and could finally go into the room. There I was introduced to the new form of embarrassment of trying to make small talk with a male nurse while we waited for the doctor and both of us knowing that I only had on a pair of panties on beneath the gown.
Thankfully we didn't have to wait long and after a I singed a few consent forms I stepped up to the machine and introduced my taste buds to the drink I named above. The real name is called barium and though it was not the most disgusting thing I had ever taste it was the most uncomfortable because I had no choice but to drink it. You see when you drink barium it shows up on the x-ray like the picture below.
FYI this is not my x ray
When I looked over on the monitor and saw this I freaked out a bit. Thanks to my mom's sharp eye during my childhood and my general caution I had never sustained an injury server enough to need an x-ray and when I saw this I was struck by how fragile it looked. My stomach flexed and pulsed and it was hard to believe that pretty soon it would be cut down to the size of an ice cube. As quickly as this moment came it left and I was sent out of the office with a sort of queasy feeling in my stomach and a granola bar in my hand. As uncomfortable as this experience was I am thankful for it. My doctor should be calling me with my surgery appointment any day now and I can't wait!
Hello people of the internet! If you were to come up and ask me "Hey what type of music you like?" you would get a shrug and a mumbled "All music.". Because when it comes to music I'm not picky. I like everything from the golden relics of the classic and jazz era, to the shimmering monuments of rock and R and B, even the sparkly trinkets of pop and techno have caught my ear. However as non-fastidious as my musical selection is there are a few songs that rub me the wrong way and the Punk Princes of Rock-aka Avril Lavigne-has added to that collection with her most recent "hit"-and I use that term extremely lightly-Hello Kitty.
No, no, no not that Hello Kitty, though I wished to the all mighty God it was. I was talking about this Hello Kitty:
I'm not gonna sugar coat it people, I fucking hate this song. I originally found out about it's existence by watching a parody-which you can wath here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=op7ImVx20BI trust me it is hilarious-and I could not believe that the song it was making fun of was real and a part of me died when I found out it was. I despise this "song"-again I use that term extremely lightly-for three specific reasons:
1. It's everything I hate about the music industry today
From it's lazy lyrics to its uninspired dubstep composition Hello Kitty is a twisted collage of all the things about modern music that I can not stand! Everytime I listen to it I feel like my intelligence is being insulted; that everyone that had a pox-infected-hand in this creation thought I was so simple that they didn't need to put in so much as a teaspoon of effort in order to entertain me! And the music video....to be honest I don't think it is racist. To me racism is when you use the myths and stereotypes of a certain race to insult a member or members of that race because you hate them and I don't think Mrs. Lavigne hates Japanese or Asian people. However I do believe that she is ignorant of their culture outside of an anime. In fact when I first saw the music video I thought that it was just a live action version of some sugary cartoon.
For some reason I find the image on the bottom is more respectable than the one on the top
While listening I found myself cringing at both the song and Mrs. Lavigne's interpretation of the Asian pop culture. Hell, I still cringe when I think about!
2. It came out of no where
Let me be clear: I don't mind when a singer changes his or her's music style, especially when they haven't been heard from for as long as Mrs. Lavigne was. The last song of her's I listened to on the radio was What the Hell back in 2011. Granted that may not seem like a long time to some people but in the fast paced online world we live in today Mrs. Lavigne might as well have been hiding under a rock for a couple centuries. But my problem is that there was no hint that she would go this way. The songs she produced before this-my favorites being Here's to never growing up and Rock n'Roll-fooled me into thinking that Mrs. Lavigne was going back to her punk roots. Instead she made a sharp U-turn into crazy-neon-sugar-seizure-boulevard and dragged you along despite how much you fought and screamed! Now if she had taken this slow-introduced some techno beats on her other songs or pepped up her videos-then Hello Kitty wouldn't have been the full powered falcon punch to the jaw that it is!
3. I find it catchy
Despite how insulting it is to me, despite the fact that it spits in the face of everything I find good about music I can not help but find this song catchy! And the scariest part is I have no idea why! I hate the tune, I hate the lyrics, and I especially hate that juvenile and ear-stabbingly-annoying-hook but for some reason I can't help myself from singing along with it. And I hate myself for it.
Regardless I hope that this is the end of Mrs. Lavigne's journey into this form of music. She is good singer and performer and she doesn't need to sell out like this in order for her fans to like her...although acting like she likes them back wouldn't hurt.
I bet you a hundred bucks she wished she had a hazmat suit on at that moment
Hello people of the internet, and a happy father's day! If you haven't already go to that contributor of your extra Y or X chromosome and give him a big hug. And if he isn't there because of a showgirl in Atlantic city go hug your mom! But to be serious dads are awesome especially mine. Even though he is on the other side of the country I know that he'd be there in a second if I need him. Love you dad!
Hello people of the internet! Though what I am about to say is sure to ruffle a few feathers it has to be said: I wish summer was shorter. Yes, I like that these three months of academic freedom grant me the liberty of sleeping in, going to the pool everyday, and to walk around my living space with nothing but an old T shirt and underwear the magic of summer vaca gets old pretty fast.
This feeling didn't come on recently, I have felt this way as far back as middle school. In fact I remember this one summer vacation where my mom asked me to help her paint her room. It was the second month in and I was so bored that breathing in paint fumes for a a few hours sounded like a trip to Disney world! With my enthusiasm the primer was put up in minutes and we had to wait for it to dry before we could put on the top coat. But instead of following my mom's lead and going out to get some fresh air I sat down on the bed and watched it dry.
You heard me right, I was so bored that I sat there for a whole hour watching paint dry. And you want to know what the scary thing was? That was one of the most entertaining moments of that summer! Well other than when my mom almost killed us by using bleach and ammonia to clean the floors, but that is another story for another day. The point is summer vacation is horrible and I'm not the only one who thinks so!
A study conducted in the state if Texas showed that up to 1.9 million children go hungry during the summer vacation because they depend on the school for their lunch and breakfast. Teachers and other school staff suffer too since they don't get paid on the break. On top of that kids lose two months worth of knowledge during the break and I know that is not exaggeration. I remember on the first day back talking to kids who had forgotten how to multiply and even add!
Now I'm not saying that we should get rid of summer vacation all together. I do believe that it is a good thing to give kids a break but instead of one huge three month one the schools should just make one or two more two week breaks or add on a few more days to the one they already have.
Hello people of the internet! The video you just watched was created by the hilarious team of College Humor detailing the panic twenty year olds feel once they realize they are getting old. And while I do admit it is annoying I also believe that it is valid. You see, I believe, that the panic that the people in this age group isn't just from realizing that they a physically aging but that they are getting more and bigger responsibilities.
When you think about a lot stuff happens in your twenties: You start college, get a job, move out of your parents house, start getting serious with your boyfriend or girlfriend, maybe even get married and start a family of your own. You go through all these very adult things but a large part of you still feels like a kid and that's where the panic comes from.
You start to worry if you'll make a mistake, say or do the wrong thing and up messing up your whole life. On top of that you start to truly become aware of not only your mortality but the mortality of those around you. As you are getting old you realize that your parents are getting old too and at some point they are going to need you just to function.
In what seems like an instance it will go from your mom putting a band aid on your cut to you scheduling doctor's appointments for her. Instead of your dad reminding you to clean your room soon you'll be reminding him to take his pills. Time is slipping through your fingers at an alarming rate and no matter how hard you try you can't stop it. As scary as this is it isn't impossible to get through.
Now I admit that I'm not some sage who has never looked in the mirror and felt a thrill of terror when she saw a grey hair. I'm still scared of adulthood but that fear lessened once I realized it is okay not to be perfect. You are going to make mistakes, big ones, but you'll learn from them. You'll take the punches and slaps maturity gives you and use the faded bruises to guide you through the rest of your life. And just like the older people in the video one day you'll look back on all the things you panicked about in your twenties and realize how small and stupid they truly were. So right now just enjoy your life and everyone you are blessed to have in it.
Hello people of the internet! And welcome to my second "as told by gifs" post!
This time around I will be telling you the tale of my high school senior prom using the snippets of looped motion known as gifs. I promise that this story is not pathetic as it seems and apologize for the super long source list at the bottom. Now that that's out of the way...
FYI: I didn't want to use this one but I couldn't find a gif that said "let's get on with it."
The first thing that struck me as I was cleaning out my locker on the last day of my Junior year wasn't that I was one more step away from college-and the horror stories that would be my future roommates-nor that I had yet to learn how to drive. No, what consumed my young seventeen year old mind was that pinnacle of the high school experience, the crown jewel of teenhood simply known as the senior prom.
Don't get me wrong, my Junior prom was great and I enjoyed every single second of it. In fact I was so overjoyed that as I sat on the steps of the hotel where it was hosted-waiting for my sister to show up-I broke into a rendition of I enjoy being a girl from the Flower Drum song! When I did it at the time I felt like:
But now that I am older and look back on it I feel like:
But I digress, the point is even though I thought my junior prom was excellent I knew my senior prom was going to be AWESOME! I firmly believed this because at the time I thought I was going to:
1. Workout and diet the whole summer and get a super hot body for my troubles
2. Find a dress so fabulous it would make all the other girls feel like they were wearing potato sacks in comparison.
3. Find me a delicious piece of man candy to dance the night away with!
You had me at come on
With this in mind I stormed out of school determined to make these dreams into a reality. On the first note: even though I did lose a pretty good amount away I didn't get the banging body I envisioned in my head...mainly because I can't say no to sweets.
On the second note: I didn't just find one dress but two. The first one was a green princess-like-ball gown that I swept off a thrift store rack. Even though my mom agreed that it was beautiful she was hesitant because it was two sizes too small. But after some-and by that I mean a lot-negotiating-and by that I mean begging-and promising that I would slim down to fit it she brought it for me. At the time I was totally confident that I could do it, I mean, losing two dress sizes couldn't be that hard, right?
It wasn't really the sweets that screwed me over but more so the overwhelming stress of being a senior, moving again to a new house-and lying about it since it was literally a few feet out of my schools district-and trying to figure out what college to go to as well as how the hell I was going to pay for it.
What does FASFA even mean!?
Despite this I was still determined to fit into that dress, even though at that point the only way I could would be if the liposuction fairy payed me a visit. Then one day, on the car ride home, I heard a radio station announced that they were going to be selling prom dresses that saturday. Since my family and I had nothing planned that week we thought that it would fun to go down and take a look. When the day arrived we got up really early, hoping to get a good spot in line but-much like my registration journey-we thought that the line would be like this:
When it was actual like this
Despite the mount Everest of teenage girls that stood between me and the store I still got in line, ending up two whole blocks away. The good news was I only had to wait ten minutes. The bad news was I only had to wait ten minutes because the store ran out of dresses.
Heartbroken I decided to make a last ditch look into a nearby Ross. At first I was about to give up but then I caught sight of the garment my mom had in her arms: It was a cocktail dress made out of black taffeta-like material with a band cobalt blue sliver on the bust and a ribbon that cinched it at the waist. I practically floated into the dressing room and when I put that dress on I felt like, I felt like, well:
I felt so good in that dress I knew it had to be mine! So I put the green princess gown in the closet and found some ass-kicking heels and was set. On the third note: I didn't get a date. There was this one boy who I thought would work but didn't thanks to money issues.
But hey don't feel sorry for me. I went stag and against popular belief I had the best time ever! Unlike with my junior my senior was held at a downtown nightclub with a red carpet theme that made me feel like a queen, even though I didn't actually run for or win prom queen.
I felt so good that at one point I just sat outside in the club's courtyard looking up at the sky and thanking the lord for my life. Unfortunately that night had to end at some point and I ended up walking to the car with a goodie bag in one hand and my heels in the other. The next day my nail polish was chipped and my hear felt like it could shatter from the amount of old hair spray in it but it was all worth it. Looking back I can find no flaw in my senior prom, it truly was magical.
Hello people of the internet! I love amusement parks! They are places specifically designed to make people happy and if they got rid of the long lines, over priced food, and the sometime handsy park mascots each one would be a little slice of heaven! I am proud to say that I am so well traveled in AP's that I'm actually almost sick of Universal Studios and-the summary of all things good with childhood-Disney World. Emphasis on the word almost. Despite my love for them there are a couple of rides and attractions that add a bitter sting to that blurry eyed stumble to the car at the end of the day which I'm going to tell you right now! But before I start let me say that in the off chances that the people who made these rides are reading this: I mean you no offense. I truly appreciate the work you do to bring such joy to others and am just voicing my opinion based on personal experience. With that out of the way let's kick this list off with:
4. Walt Disney's Enchanted Tiki Room (Disney World, Magic Kingdom)
Now my family and I stepped into this "delightful" little shack during our 2012 Christmas vacation by accident. We were looking for the Pirates Of The Caribbean ride and when we saw that there was a show coming up in few seconds thought we'd pop in to rest our-by then-aching feet and watch a little show that I'd thought would be cute and charming. Oh how, painfully, wrong I was. According to Disney World.com the Enchanted Tiki Room was installed in 1963 and though it had been updated with modern technology likea state-of-the-art show-control system, re-mastered audio, and a new, more versatile and energy-efficient lightingsystem along with Zazu and Iago-From the Lion King and Aladdin-greeting you at the entrance it still showed it's age. I know the people at Disney wanted to keep Walt's original vision but by then the vision was stale and the animatronic birds creepy!
I swear to God its cold plastic eyes are staring into my soul!
Oh, and for those who think that A Small World is the most ear-stabbingly-annoying Disney song have obviously not heard The Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room song. Or, thanks to the lack of padding on the bird's beaks, The Clack, Clickety, Clack Room song! I remember laying awake inside our rented vacation room trying to dig out the remnants of that song and those clicks from the recesses of my mind! I was able to find a full video of the ride but I warn you that once you see what is behind those grass covered doors it will never leave, it will never leave!
Also,unless your heart gave out or there was a fire-but I doubt even if then-you were stuck in those backless, uncomfortable, wooden benches until those seed-of-chucky-birds said you could leave. Sorry if you disagree with me but it is my opinion. Speaking of animatronic horrors I introduce to you:
3. Splash Mountain (Disney World, Magic Kingdom)
A little word of wisdom: If you ever get on a ride meant for adults and you see that the cart has no seat belts or any kind of restraints RUN AWAY FROM IT AS IF IT WERE THE DEVIL HIMSELF WEARING A SPIKED TWENTY INCH STRAP ON AND HOLDING A REBECCA BLACK CD! Not because it's possibly dangerous but because that is the international symbol that some serious shit is about to go down! I'm not going to bother putting a video to this because I know that you could not call yourself a Disney park goer unless you took a spin on this soaking wet terror!
And it's not exactly the five story water slide that has me quaking in my sneakers but the teeth grinding cruel build up. As you float along, helplessly, in a water speckled log characters from the obscure and sorta racist film Song Of The South serenade with cheery songs like: “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah",“Ev’rybody’s Got a Laughing Place", and “How Do You Do?”. I know that this was supposed to be charming but in my personal opinion I think Billy from saw is much cuter than those things!
Billy: Do You want to play a game?
Me: Yes! Just take me away from these fur covered demons!
To add on to that the ride teases you with two faux-drops-one of them guarded by two vultures who look like they can't waist to tear the rotting flesh from your corpse-before finally coming to the real drop. By the end of the ride you are soaking wet and left with nothing but the lingering chill of fear and a photo of you taken as you descend down the slope to immortalize said fear. But no matter how uncomfortable Splash Mountain and its possesed animatronics make you feel at least it doesn't leave you aching like:
2. Stitch's Great Escape! (Disney World, Magic Kingdom)
In this attraction-based on the animated film Lilo and Stitch-you and your family are recruited by the Galactic federation to watch over the galaxies most nefarious law breakers as prison guards. In a matter of seconds the atmosphere goes from happy-go-lucky to deadly serious as you are escorted to a a theater-like room to witness the arrival of a level ten criminal who turns out to be the little blue monster himself: expirament 626 AKA Stitch.
Just like in the film Stitch manages to get out of his restraints and runs amako around the theater, jumping on top of the seats, burping in people's faces, and even tricking the "lasers" to shoot at you. Now, unlike the first two rides the effects in this one weren't bad. The lighting, sounds, and props did a good job of immersing you into the stories and had me both laughing and shrieking at Stitches. But after my second round at this ride I don't think I'll go on it again because it did something no ride should ever do: cause me physical pain.
How could this happen, you might ask? Well turn your attention to the picture below.
These are the seats for the ride and as you notice they have harnesses on them. This is not because they jerk or move around-though it would be cool if they did-but because they move up and down to make the people sitting in them think that Stitch is running and bouncing on them. Now when you get into the theater you are instructed to sit up straight and hold still as the harnesses lower down and stop automatically at your shoulders. I really wished that the creators of this ride had made these harnesses stop just a few inches above the persons shoulders because when they do start going up and down they hurt!
As i type this my bones ache with the phantom pains, the skin blistering beneath the hot Florida sun as I pulled down my T-shirt to rub at my collar bone. While Stitch and his escape left me aching this next ride-the one ride I hate the most out of all previous three-left me crying, shaking, and mentally broken by fear! Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my number one most hated amusement park ride!
1. Doctor Doom's Fearfall (Universal Studious, Island's of Adventure)
Yeah, despite the previous contents of this list the mouse does not hold claim to my most hated ride but one of marvels most dastardly baddies. Like with most rides at US this one comes with a story: Victor Von Doom, AKA Dr. Doom, has constructed a machine he is sure will be able to destroy his enemies, The Fantastic Four. The catch is that this machine doesn't run on stuff like gas or electricity but on pure fear! And the dictator plans to extract said fear by "forcing" people to ride on his Fearfall, a 150 foot drop tower that will squeeze every once of terror from your body!
The reason why I hate this ride is because at no point do I actually enjoy it! Now, it's common knowledge amongst my family that I am a big baby when it comes to roller coasters and rides like this, whimpering and chewing my nails down to the beds as I waited in line. But once I sit down in that chair and the ride gets going all of those nerves are blasted away by joy!
But that joy doesn't come when I get on this torture device; from start to finish I keep my eyes glued shut while I pray to the all mighty lord that I live to make it to the Jurassic Park attraction! I think my fear from this comes from I just don't trust it. What if the cable snaps or a support goes out? I know this is irrational but I just can't shake it and if I ever go back I am definitely skipping it!
Even though these rides rubbed me the wrong way it doesn't mean that they will do the same thing to you. So stay safe and have fun!
Hello people of the internet! You know for the longest time I believed that Harvey Levin, creator and host of the celebrity news network TMZ, had sold his soul to the devil. I mean how else could he have possibly gain his fame? When you get down to the bare bones TMZ is nothing but a bunch of sad, bitter, "journalist"-and I use that term extremely lightly-making fun and criticizing celebrities for every single thing they do. It's disgusting, not funny, and completely against America's sensibility so it only make sense that old Harv damned his mortal soul to hell in order for the Dark Prince to bewitch us into watching it!
But now that I have seen Mr. Levin's newest "reality"-I also use that term lightly-TV show, Famous in 12, I realize that I was wrong. The truth is Mr. Levin didn't need to sell soul to the devil because HE IS THE DEVIL!
Look readers, look and know the face of pure evil
Why do I think this? Because only the lord of darkness could create a show as disgusting, low, and unashamedly skanky as Famous in 12. In the Artigas family is taken to hollywood in order to become famous with the help of the father of lies himself Harvey Levin. The mother wants to be an erotic fiction writer, the Dad Mike, to become a DJ; Taliah, the eldest daughter, to dance; Jameelah, her younger sister, to be a model. But the catch to this show is that the family only have twelve weeks to get famous or they have to go back home
From left: Aamina, Maariyah El-Shabazz, Mike Artiaga Jr, Dove Artiaga, Mike Artiaga Sr., Angie Artiga, Jameelah El-Shabazz, Grandpa Joel, Taliah Martin, Jordan, Grandma Lina
Now, one might wonder how the hell anybody could become so famous in such a short timeline? If you said through hard work, dedication, and honest to God talent then you would be wrong! For according to Mr. Levin-at least in the girl's case-the only way the Artiaga family to hit it big is to be complete whores. I'm not kidding, Mr. Levin in his very first meeting with the family basically tells the girls that there talent will mean nothing unless they have sex with a celebrity, film it, and have it "accidentally" leaked to the press. He even had them meet with the king of sex tapes Ray J, though they said it was completely unplanned.
This is all I could do the whole time
To make it worst TMZ tried to cover up this blatant cash grab by calling it a "social experiment". I know that this is total bull because if it was actually a social experiment the Mr. Levin would actually care about these people and he doesn't. He doesn't care that the pressure and stigma of fame might tear this family apart. He doesn't care that these three beautiful girls could be taken advantage of and abused because they listened to his advice. He doesn't care that he is validating the belief that nowadays you don't need actual talent to become famous, just a nice pair of tits and video camera! Harvey Levin is not some avant garde visionary who is going to show us the pitfalls and dark underbelly of Hollywood, he's just an oily version of President Snow; sitting back and watching as these people tear each other apart for his own sick amusement! The show even says they don't care if we love or hate this family!
Trust me, the odds will never be in your favor
But unlike that movie there is no Jennifer Lawrence character who will stand up to this douche and free us from his tyranny. It's up to us to put a stop to this because this show is proof that "reality" TV has gone too far. The madness seeped into beauty pageants, and hair salons, and even doctors office! It has taken the struggle and pain of groups of people and turned it into a spectacle to be laughed at and mocked. I swear on everything that I believe in that I will never watch another episode of Famous in 12 and I urge you to do the same. Sources from: http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/tv/2014/06/02/famous-in-12/9774869/ https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tDgZwE4P_s0/U4-iIscp9oI/AAAAAAAAAEo/EbCU-0dhlUM/s1600/pl.png
Hello people of the internet! By now I assume that you have already heard about this crazy case in which two twelve year old girls, Morgan Geyser and Anasia Weier, brutally stabbed another twelve year old girl a total of nineteen times. The accused attackers didn't commit the murders for money or revenge but in order to sacrifice their victim to Slenderman. For those of you who don't know Slenderman is an online monster know for his popular video horror game in which he stalks the player through dark woods and abandoned buildings as they collect letters he left in order to survive.
A "photo" of Slenderman
Apparently the two psychopaths had been planning this for months and decided to put their plan into action when they invited their victim to a sleepover. The three then went to the woods, under the false pretense of playing hide and seek, and while one of them held the girl down the other started stabbing her. When the two were arrested one of them, Morgan Geyser, allegedly said: “The bad part of me wanted her to die, the good part of me wanted her to live,”
This case is not only creepy as hell eerily similar to the murder of Skylar Neese. Much like in this case the sixteen year old was lured into the woods and stabbed to death by her two female friends in July 6, 2012, allegedly because she had witnessed the two making out a few weeks prior. Unlike that case the victim survived the attack and was able to crawl to a path and was found by a biker who called an ambulance. The girl is now in stable condition and her attackers ar in custody. For more details on this story go here, http://www.nbcnews.com/news/crime-courts/fantasy-slender-man-meme-inspires-horrific-wisconsin-stabbing-n121311
Hello people of the internet! Now I think it is safe to say that you have seen this thing floating around the internet:
Ladies and gentleman this is not a compilation of your worst nightmares nor a demon created by the dark lord Satan with the soul purpose of destroying the integrity of man but the new mascot for Mcdonald's happy meal. His name is Happy-really creative name people at Mcdonalds-and he and his wide smile have been terrorizing people all across the world since May. If you can't tell by now this thing creeps me out, so much so that I am typing this post as fast as I physically can so I can scroll down the page and be free of his serial-killer-gaze.
My fear of this thing is not alone for all across the internet I have found blogs, videos, and memes depicting people's horror and terror over this monstrosity. Many are asking why Mcdonalds would create him in the first place or why they continue to keep him even though the majority of people who have seen this have had the following reaction:
Though those questions are valid after I had climbed out from under my bed and walked around my house with a butcher knife checking if all the doors and windows were locked so Happy couldn't sneak in and devour my soul while I slept I started wondering why exactly I found him so creepy? After a few hours I realized that-at least in my case-the reason was a combination of two things: One, Happy's features are too human and two they're too ambiguous.
You see, the mouth and the eyes are the most expressive features on the face for most of the creatures on earth, especially for humans. A single quirk of the lips or the barest glimmer in the eyes can tell you more about a person's thoughts or feeling about something than if they had spoke. In Happy's case though his features aren't photorealistic they have some characteristics that distance him from a cartoon, like the shadowing on his teeth, or the lack of an upper lid on his eyes or the slight bags under said eyes. These jarring contrast leave people in a limbo like state trying to decide if the face is more human or more cartoon.
I believe the people who find Happy creepy are the ones whose brain sub countrontously decided that Happy is more human and this realization opens up another can of worms. Now that they have decided that this thing is human they have to figure out what is his motive? Sure, his smile looks wide and genueally happy but his eyes look so tired and strained like he's a college student who has spent the last three nights studying for a final and is just managing to hold his sleep deprived psyche together.
This ambiguity on his motives and what he is feeling is causes us to be anxious and the fact that he is not completely human and thus we might not be able to destroy if he comes after us is what makes us fear him. I know I may be reading a little too into this but if anybody ever a box with this things face on it near me I'll rip it up, set it on fire, and scatter it's ashes to the four corners of the earth!
